Category Archives: People I Want to Punch in the Throat

Globes and Shout Outs

First, off, I need to give a couple of shout-outs to two of my fave bloggers at the moment. My friend Tina has an awesome one. If you want a witty, brutally honest and female perspective of the single life in NYC, check her out at I must say, her comments about manscaping literally made me wet my pants. Seriously. She’s that funny, folks. And her latest post about grammar police is a must-read for any of you affected peeps who just can’t let it go. I got schooled on that one too.

Second, Jenn at People I Want to Punch in the Throat has been one of my idols ever since her expose on Elf Mommies. Check her out! Warning – if profanity offends you, take her with a grain of salt – but she’s just so dang funny! Her take on the Golden Globes and her friends’ live tweets during the actual awards are priceless.

Which brings me to my second point today. The Golden Globes. There are three occasions per year where life stops in my house. Globes, Oscars and Emmys. Really. Now, I read a post on Facebook calling these ‘vacuous awards shows,’ but really? I’m a smart person and by no means shallow. Everyone needs a dose of vacuous Hollywood now and then for their own good. If you can’t agree – even in just a tiny way – then you’re being affected. Stop it. So, in solidarity for all of us vacuously-minded, here are a few of my Globes highlights.

  1. Tommy Lee Jones. Didn’t. Want. To. Be. There. At all. Really, dude – at least fake it for the cameras, or you just may not get hired next time.
  2. Jodie Foster. Absolutely LOVED her speech and comments about privacy. So important – and we tend to think that actors don’t deserve any sense of it. Fab reminder, Jodie!
  3. Jennifer Lawrence. Fabulous hair, fantastic gown and color – but what was up with the Mad Men boobs? Seriously…
  4. Jessica Chastain. Love her. Gorgeous and not stick-thin. If I could gain a few pounds and look like that I’d be happy! When I told the minions that she was the voice of ‘Gia’ from Madagascar 3, they both stopped, in a trance, and said, “She’s so pretty!” Uh oh. I see the girl trouble coming. Better get out my Big Bad Mommy Stick.
  5. Anne Hathaway. I like her. I really do. I’ve even been told I look like her. But she’s starting to get annoying simply from overexposure. Media peeps – STOP IT!
  6. Michelle Dockery. Looked fantastic and I was disappointed that she didn’t win. But at least Dame Maggie supported the Downton fans!
  7. Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner. How cute are they?? As much flack as she gets from the media about looking sloppy – get over it. She’s a mom who obviously has her priorities straight. And she cleans up well!
  8. The Globes always get more entertaining as the evening progresses.Why? The booze, of course. It’s funny how the speeches get longer and less coherent the later it gets.
  9. Julianne Moore. Gorgeous woman – please leave the Sarah Palin beehive at home.
  10. And finally – Taylor Swift. Please please please – if you are her publicist – have her work with a drama coach on the ‘I didn’t win but I’m still a good sport anyway’ face. Seriously.

So that’s all I can think of at the moment. What were your fave moments? Who were your picks for fashion disaster? I promise it doesn’t make you shallow!!

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