So today’s the day. My Big Test at work. They’ve been pretty cool about it actually – leaving me to myself so that I can retype all of my notes and go over all the online resources. And that’s been nice. But dangit, it seems like the more I try to prepare the more uptight I get about it.
THAT’s the reason I specifically didn’t prepare for the GRE when I took it a few years ago. There are just some things that you can’t study for. I’m one of those people that tend to psych myself out if I’m over prepared, at least for tests. Musically too. Back in the day I would actually make myself leave the instrument in the case the night before an audition. Like my teacher said, ‘If you’re not prepared now, cramming won’t help.’
And I need to remember that today during The Big Test. Honestly, it shouldn’t be that bad. It’s open note and I’ve got access to all of the online Job Aid materials. So why am I even remotely concerned? Three reasons, really.
- All of the coursework for this certification has been online. Each course had a quiz at the end. And some of the questions were pretty vague and random. Definitely NOT written by teachers, to tell the truth. Almost like some of those video defensive driving questions where they ask what color the speaker’s shirt was, just to make sure you actually watched it. And random questions freak me out. I tend to read too much into them, not go with my gut and end up doing less-than-perfect.
- The passing rate for certification here is 80%. 80 percent. I’m having real trouble wrapping my teacher-brain around that one. 70 is passing, right? Always has been, always will be. Even for educator certification. And that stresses me out.
- What’s on the line? Um, a new job title, a step up, business cards and my ego. There are lots of people in other offices that have passed this test. So if I don’t, my positively negative brain wants to classify that as a failure.
And finally – I love my boss, I really do. And she really wants me to do well. So much that she’s been randomly popping over to my desk all week and asking me random practice test questions. She means well, but that’s starting to freak me out. Just a little.
So today I’m going to try and think as little as possible about this stuff. At least, until 2:30 when it’s showtime.
Wish me luck! And any suggestions on how to get my brain to dial back the stress level would be much appreciated!!