Category Archives: Choices

Big Day – and a Comment

It’s a Big Day around here. Minion #1 turns ten. Double digits. Wow. That means a few things in our fam. First, he gets to pick the restaurant for tonight’s birthday dinner. After I get done working, that is. I’m already wondering which of the Deadly Trifecta it will be – Chili’s, Chuy’s or Carinos. Since we took the ‘rents to Chuy’s on Sunday, I’m betting on Carinos. Minions can load up on pasta, alfredo sauce and bread. Carbs, anyone? At least they have lemon rosemary chicken with veggies and just a bit o’ pasta – so I can feel like I’m at least trying to avoid the food coma, even if it does taste like standard chain-restaurant food (and not even a bit Italian).

Then it’s back to the house for cake and presents. Cake today being cupcakes from Crave, the oh-so-yummy cupcake shop across the street from my office. Right next to Starbucks and, ironically, My Fit Foods. Ha! I always wonder how many Fit Foodies end up snarfing down cupcakes in the car after their scientifically-portion-controlled lunches. Makes me grin.

But back to The Birthday. Festivities don’t stop there, folks! Oh no – we’ve got The Partay coming up on Saturday. Minion #1 is so excited that his little body almost can’t handle it. We really don’t pump him full of caffeine and sugar – the shakes are from excitement about The Partay. And on the docket? Something different this year. He actually voted down a big shindig in favor of a few friends at the house for a trip to the roller rink, ordering in pizza from our fave neighborhood joint (Fox’s Pizza rocks!) and a sleepover. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking – but a sleepover with four ten-year-old boys is a heck of a lot calmer than a slumber party with a bevy of tween girls. Trust me on this – I used to be one. There’s no comparison – although I may have my words handed to me on a silver platter Sunday morning. We’ll see.

So that’s today. I’d post pics of Number One if I could, but Google seems to want me to pay for image storage now, so pics are out.

And yesterday? Why yes – I was home by seven and comatose by eight, thank you very much. A bit more energetic today, thanks to the miracles of coffee and Coke Zero. We’ll see how long that lasts.

Speaking of yesterday – I admit I’m a bit confounded and confusded (Yes, I coined a word. Deal.) that my conversation about choice, inner peace and predestination didn’t raise any discussion or comments whatsoever. Hmmm. Either it’s no new news to anyone else or I’m losing my touch with words. Bummer. I was hoping for some spirited discussion on that one!

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Filed under Blog Comments, Boys, Carinos, Choices, Kids' birthdays, Moms, working moms

It’s All Subjective Anyway

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately. About philosophy and reality. Heavy stuff, I know. That whole idea from Descartes about reality being just a figment of our imagination. Both scary and king of thought provoking or tempting at the same time. I mean, if I could just imagine a totally different life tomorrow? Take away all the crap and have it the way I want it? Man, who wouldn’t want that?

What I really need right now is a ‘Q’ moment. Like that one episode of TNG where Q shows Picard how his life would have been different – drastically – because of one simple choice. Wish I could just look at that and see.

And why is it that memory is so subjective? Probably because it involves people. How can two people remember – or not remember – an event so incredibly differently? I mean, I can remember every detail of one past New Year’s Eve as clearly as if it were yesterday. After spending the evening with friends, a dear friend and I struck out on our own to look at lights and hang out – and ended up in one of those horrible, logical, non-shouting big deal ‘discussions.’ I remember what they said. I remember the pain – it cut me to the core and didn’t stop. I cried and cried. I cried for two days, basically – until my eyes swelled so much that I had to go to the ER to get my contacts taken out because my eyeballs were so swollen. I held onto that hangdog pathetic ‘poor me’ attitude for a while. But it didn’t work. It didn’t solve the problem.

So what happened? My competitive streak kicked in. I was going to show them. Prove that I could be smarter, prettier, thinner, more talented and a better friend than anyone else could be. That didn’t work either. Still doesn’t, sadly enough.

And my friend? They don’t remember any of it. None. Zero. Zilch. They remember only that our friendship was peaceful and happy the entire year.

How is that? I mean, really? Can they really not remember? Or are they lying? I can’t think of any reason why they would have to lie to me now, after all this time. It just seems really Matrix-like that I have all of these detailed memories – and they don’t Just a vague sense of contentment and happiness. Any what really sucks is that I’m the one carrying around the negative stuff. Not them. Me.

Why is that? Is it just my tendency toward the negative? My cursedly accurate memory? Or is that really not how things went down at all – and just my skewed perspective of events?

It’s weird. Really weird. Definitely something to ponder – what if the people we know and situations in which we find ourselves are all just figments of our imagination?

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Filed under Choices, Memory, Perspective, Reality, Star Trek

Fringe-tastic

So, last night the spouse and I had a gift-wrapping fest for the kiddoes. Got everything wrapped and tagged, and the Santa stuff is safely hidden back in his trunk. Away from snooping eyes. During the wrap-fest we got caught up on the latest episode of Fringe, one of our favorite shows.

If you’re not familiar with it, it’s kind of a paranormal sci-fi thing. Right now there are these creepy-looking bald guys called Observers in the plot line. They’ve got this handy brain implant thing that allows them to not only pop through time and space, but also see all possible chains of events stemming from every choice made by an individual. And they look like this:

 

Creepy, huh? But I wish I had one of those brain things sometimes. Not the baldness and creep factor that goes with it, of course. But really – that ability would be so handy. It goes back to my obsession with the movie Sliding Doors. Think about it. You could instantly answer all of those ‘what if’ questions that go through your mind every day. For example, what if:

I had gone to LA when my composer friend asked me to come and do studio work with him after college?
I decide to wear the black flats instead of the really uncomfortable heels?
This job interview goes really well?
My friend goes on the blind date I’m thinking of setting her up with?
I actually saywhat’s on my mind at any given time instead of using the filter?
(insert chosen person’s name here) were to get run over by a bus today? OK, granted, that one is a joke and I’m not really serious – but sometimes you honestly wonder.
I had made XX different choice – where would I be now? Again, this is a ‘grass is greener’ question. And I always have to remind myself that the grass is greener because there’s more poop over there. But still, it would be nice to know for sure, right?
I could see people’s reactions to my blog and/or emails, and know why they weren’t emailing back or COMMENTING ON MY BLOG?? Seriously. It would be nice to get a comment now and then.
The article I wrote yesterday in a fit of inspiration as aWriter actually got published?

You can totally see how useful this brain implant would be, right? Now I’m sure it would create a whole other set of issues – but sometimes wouldn’t it be nicer to just know??

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Filed under Alternate Realities, Choices, Fringe, sci-fi, Sliding Doors, what-if